What you should know about herpes

There seem to be endless myths that swirl around the sexually transmitted disease herpes. Is it just cold sores? Can you get rid of it? Is your sex life ruined if you have it? I wanted to clear up some of the confusion.

There are two types of herpes, fueling much of the confusion right from the outset. Herpes simplex virus-1 is most often associated with oral herpes, while herpes simplex virus-2 is linked to genital herpes. It's true that Type 1 is more commonly spread via the mouth and Type 2 via the genitals. However, there is little difference between the two viruses, chemically speaking, and both can show up either place.

The real difference seems to be in the social stigma associated with the two. Oral herpes is often referred to as "cold sores" and written off as a common, benign condition. In sharp contrast, genital herpes is viewed as a chronic illness, which is unfair when you realize how similar the two types are, both in cause and treatment. It's important that we normalize both types of herpes to eliminate the shame that is arbitrarily associated with one of them.

Herpes results from oral or genital contact with the virus. Where you get a breakout is usually the result of which part of your body came into contact with the virus. A person with either type of herpes could transmit oral or genital herpes to their partner depending upon the type of sexual activity engaged in. Add to this that nearly two-thirds of the 45 million Americans with genital herpes and 100 million with oral herpes have no symptoms, and you can understand why the line between the two is fuzzy, at best.

The best way to protect yourself against herpes is by practicing good common sense and safer sexual practices. Outbreaks often appear as a red rash, sometimes progressing to blisters. Initial outbreaks are sometimes associated with fevers and flulike symptoms. If you see anything appearing like that, avoid sexual contact and see your doctor.

Once you transmit either kind of herpes virus, it remains permanently in your nervous system. There is a blood test that can test for herpes antibodies to check if you are a carrier, even if you have never had any symptoms.

Even if there are no visible lesions, herpes can be spread through a process known as shedding, in which the virus is active on the skin. While using a condom will protect against other STDs, it will not always protect against herpes since shedding can occur on areas not covered by the condom -- on both men and women. It happens far less often than when there is an active outbreak, but is still possible nonetheless.

The frequency of outbreaks and type of symptoms varies widely. Some people are symptom-free, others have just one breakout and still others have regular bouts of symptoms.

The good news: There are prescription medications to minimize outbreaks. Online resources and support groups offer places to share your experiences. There are even dating sites for people with herpes, which can be good for getting back out there when you discover you have it.

Most important is to remember that everyone has a part of their sexuality with which they struggle. And as Andy Warhol said -- the thing is not to make a problem about your problem. You can still have a great sex life, if you make the decision to do so.

Laura Berman, Ph.D., is a sex therapist, director of Chicago's Berman Center (www.bermancenter.com; 800-709-4709) and author of a new book, Secrets of the Sexually Satisfied Woman: 10 Keys to Unlocking Ultimate Pleasure. Have a topic you'd like to see addressed in a future column? E-mail drberman@suntimes.com
Copyright The Chicago Sun-Times, Inc.
Provided by ProQuest Information and Learning Company. All rights Reserved.